Destined to Always Be Out-of-sync?
It would probably surprise even people who know me well that I am not a morning person. For many of my growing-up and young adult years, I never followed any type of bedtime routine. I didn’t have even an informal set of tasks that culminated with climbing into bed at a certain time. Instead, I would stay awake until I literally couldn’t stay awake anymore, at which point I would fall asleep. I would then wake up, typically on the floor, at some point in the wee hours of the morning. At this time, I would haphazardly brush my teeth and crawl into bed, and then resume sleeping.
When I was a child, I overheard my mom say that she thought I was a night owl. My dad retorted that there was no such thing. He elaborated by saying that I merely stayed up too late and consequently had trouble getting up in the morning. Of the two perspectives, I agreed with my mom. Even at a young age, I felt that there was something special about the night. If you had asked me then, I would have told you that my favorite time of day was sunset. The dark hours where my brain seemed to sparkle with creativity came in at a close second-favorite. Even as a kid, my best ideas came about and my best work on projects was done at night.
I also loved watching the stars that I could only really see when we visited the coast. (Where I lived, city lights obscured all but the brightest stars. Furthermore, many of the star-like lights in the sky were quickly revealed by their movement to be airplanes.) This enjoyment of evening and night-time hours did indeed mean staying up late, as my dad had indicated. However, my dad seemed to be saying that I was staying up for the sake of staying up late. In reality, it was something that happened due to enjoyment of the moment.
The Lost Practice of Bedtime
To be fair to my parents, I need to affirm that I followed the ritual of preparing for bed during childhood. However, this process got lost somewhere in my preteen years. It only resumed due to following my husband’s example, and admittedly, I do it only reluctantly. It’s hard to explain my reluctance. Logically, I know that following a bedtime routine and getting sleep is a good thing. Yet this knowledge doesn’t outweigh the fact that my brain starts working at night and I don’t want to shut it down. It’s hard to reconcile the schedule of the world/work life and getting enough sleep AND making use of the golden idea time that comes to me at night.
Though I find that I come up with my best ideas at night, the way of the world means being up by some certain time in the morning. Working a job with certain schedule expectations, as well as being a mom, does not allow for sleeping until noon. I could stay up late and try to get up early, but I’ve learned the hard way that that doesn’t work. (At least, it doesn’t work past a certain age, and I have passed that age.) That leaves the choice of whether to stay up late and then get up at the last possible minute in the morning (with family chaos already in full swing), or to force myself into bed and then drag myself out of bed early.
Choosing Between Staying Up and Getting Up
I have discovered that the latter is better. It is better, even though it is the least comfortable, and feels completely contrary to my internal wiring.
I have discovered that it is better to wake up early and make the most of the morning. However, it’s hard to make it happen. I have heard several suggestions repeated by multiple sources, and their wisdom is solid. However, for night owls, I think that taking these pieces of advice one step further, or taken with a twist, is what makes them work better. For me, I recognize the value of getting up early, and this is the half of the battle. Only half, though. There are two remaining practical pieces that make it happen: choosing the thing to look forward to, and considering the night and the next morning as one connected block of time.
The Value of Getting Up Early
What is the value of getting up early? While the first moments of the morning might not feel great, once I am moving, I have discovered that there is a golden feeling about doing things in the morning. Some of the same feelings found in the quiet of the night are found in the early morning also. From a spiritual perspective, there is nothing that sets the day like a morning quiet time where everything on the to-do list just STOPS, and you face what you really are, and what you really feel, and what you really believe in, deep inside.
I also learned from being an athlete that there is a sparkle to early mornings when I am getting ready for a competition. There is a magic to arriving at an event site very early and very ready to race! There is a feeling that comes from early morning sweat, even when done indoors, even just an everyday workout, that is like no other.
The value of getting up early is tied to doing things with fresh energy, and checking important tasks off of the list right away. There is a huge sense of accomplishment that comes with this action. Both the fresh energy and accomplishment are especially true when it comes to athletic training. Also, as an introvert, there is something very special about the quiet of the morning, and getting things done before most other people are awake – be it people out and about in the world or kids and family running around at home.
Something to Look Forward To
Common wisdom: Do important thing first, that’s what gets done. Morning routines help make things happen smoothly and efficiently, so more things can be checked off of the to-do list.
Racing connection: On race days, I have a focused goal that takes priority in my planning, and I wake up with excitement for what I’m about to do. I have a pre-planned “routine” on race days.
Apply it to day to day life and take it a step further:
- Determine the thing to look forward to
- Determine the secondary things using “race day” mentality
I have heard it said in a number of places that it’s best to start the day with the most important things on the to-do list, and that using a morning routine is a valuable tool, and I agree. The it IS true that the first things on the list are the things brought to completion. Yet, the usual recommendations to include in the morning routine are things that are healthy and helpful (e.g. brushing teeth, drinking a big glass of water, journaling, spiritual practices, exercise, working on a project.), and some of these things might be exciting and fun, but maybe they just fall into the “I should” category. For this reason, I would recommend that night owls take this wisdom one step further.
The this next step is something I discovered in college, and it is key for night owls: getting up early for something you enjoy is easier than getting up later for something you don’t want to do.
The Realization
I was not on an athletic team my first semester in college. Aside from one 9am class, my school day started at 11am. I relished sleeping in until around 10am most days, and dreaded and bemoaned the days that I had to wake up in time for that 9am class. I felt very grumpy, and I griped and complained to anyone who would listen. Unfortunately – and somewhat humorously – one of the people who had to listen to my complaining was a classmate who arrived in class after returning from morning practice. Coincidentally, her practice was for team that I would be on the next semester!
I never asked her, so I’m not sure if my classmate was surprised when I became her teammate. Maybe she was impressed that I continued to show up at morning practices. I learned that I could wake up much more easily at 5 a.m. and go to practice – where I wanted to be – than I could wake up at 8 a.m. or even 10 a.m. and go to a class where I had to be (but didn’t want to be!)
Pick Your “Things”
The first step to arranging your morning is to determine your thing to look forward to. This thing can’t just be something you should do or even that you need to do. There are a lot of lifestyle and success gurus that recommend creating a morning routine, and this idea is good. Also important to note that the first things on the list are what gets done. Sometimes only the first thing on the list gets done!
That said, for someone who struggles to get up, there needs to be a push. But there is an argument to having a time limit or schedule to keep other things on track. – a non-negotiable action of the morning needs to be something you ENJOY enough to look forward to, not just something important.
After picking your primary thing, choose your other secondary things. Pick things that need to be in your day. A no-brainer for athletes is a morning workout. This isn’t to say the right way to do workouts is in the morning; I personally get an itch to workout at 7 p.m. sometimes! However, even if the main workout is planned for the evening, stretching and/or short strength session in the first part of the day can set the day up right. (Riding – don’t want to do hard exertion, but warmup is great.) Spiritual practice is another key thing for me. What are your non-negotiables?
What Are You Already Doing?
Take a key from your night owl tendencies. What is it that you do in the late hours? Take note of things that other people might think it’s crazy to do at that hour. What things do you do even when you have zero time? Take note of things that you do without thinking about it that others find boring, tedious, difficult. Allow yourself to do something fun or frivolous first thing.
Take a key also from race day prep. Figuring out a “morning routine” can feel daunting, but determining what I need to do race race morning seems easier. When I can approach my morning items like I am preparing for a competition, it helps me figure out what is necessary. Also, the things that I make a point to do even if I’m arriving at an event venue before 6 a.m. should definitely be on my list!
Connecting the Time
Common wisdom: Night-before preparation makes the morning more efficient.
Racing connection: I do this for racing! I lay out or pack everything that I need. I plan when to go to sleep and when to wake up. Furthermore, I factor in everything that I need to do into the tasks of the night before or morning of the event.
Apply it to day to day life and take it a step further:
- See the morning as connected to the night before, not separate
- Work backwards from the morning’s schedule, factor in sleep, and determine tasks for the night before
Shift in Perspective
In addition to the wisdom of a morning routine, I have heard the suggestion from multiple sources to take some time in the evening to prepare for the next day. I definitely do this in painstaking detail when I compete, and it does make a difference! Even simply setting the next day’s clothes out can make a difference. However, somehow I still found this hard to do on non-race days. Then I realized something that made a big change: when I compete, I think of the evening before a race, sleeping, and then the morning of the race as one block. When I’m not racing, I think of each day as separate. When I race, I create a schedule that puts everything together.
Planners typically only plot waking hours, and this makes sense – why waste the space? However, practicing plotting in the sleep time helps me visualize the time better. Seeing the morning as connected to the night before can help in determining what tasks should happen when. Looking from the big picture perspective can help with deciding “do I stay up now and then sleep, or do I sleep and then get up early”?
A New Look at the Bedtime Routine
I changed my perspective and now no longer see night-before preparation as a painful chore. I now get set for the “thing I look forward to.” When I don’t think about the connection, I want to stay up late AND get up early, but the reality doesn’t work that way. When I see it as a big picture, and I know I need to block off time to sleep, then I have to decide: do I want to stay up late OR do I want to get up early (and do the thing I want to do).
The bedtime routine idea and thought of putting out your gear the night before has been repeated by many sources, and it does work. Even simply choosing and laying out my clothes the night before makes the morning a little easier, but if my evening routine gets to be too lengthy, I won’t do it. I have to choose the things that make a difference. What things seem to take forever in the mornings? What derails your progress? Do those things the night before.
The key though is thinking ahead and planning – have my gear all ready, plan for the morning things, plan for the day – and excitement about what I’m about to do. If I approach practice like this, it takes more time and requires planning and forethought, but can make the difference in how I approach training (and how efficient I am when I do it.)
Summary
I first recognized the value of mornings in college. Enjoyment of my morning workouts and the desire to train got me out of bed earlier than I’d been able to wake up to go to class. I recognized the need to put myself to bed so that I could wake up early. After completing the morning practices, I felt that I was set up well for the day. I had completed one of my priorities already. That way, if I was able to work out in the evening, it was supplemental – extra credit, and not a major “to do” hanging over my head all day.
In summary, hope for the night owl lies in this: First, recognize the things you enjoy about the morning. Second, determine your non-negotiables. Third, think about things the night before – plan your (couple of) tasks, prep your gear, count backwards sleep-wise and set a reasonable wakeup time. When the alarm goes off, remember the things that you prepped for and want to do, and go do them! And remember, it’s ok to stay up late too. I need to make it clear that I don’t always do this well. Mornings are still a challenge for me, and probably always will be. I have found these strategies to be helpful, though. Hopefully they will be helpful for you too, if you can relate.